Ample time spent both in football locker rooms and at church functions revealed to me long ago that most young men have at least one thing in common. Decades later, it still holds true: No one wants to marry the high school harlot, and that goes for the unabashed pagan almost as much as for the zealous follower of Christ.
While like dogs, testosterone-driven lads aplenty would use her for a time for their own bodily pleasure, they don’t relish the thought of their future children someday bumping into a classmate who informs them how easy their mother was back in the day. They’ll take her to the prom. But to stand next to her amidst the scent of fresh flowers before an altar and a few hundred witnesses and exchange pledges of lifelong faithfulness? No thanks.
Remarkably, what unites young men of vastly varied beliefs, values, and desires goes even beyond their contempt for trampish girls. They are agreed not only on what they eschew, but on what they seek. It comes as no surprise to most that adolescent guys who meditate on the Sermon on the Mount and give serious consideration to missionary work abroad seek as life partners young women who share their values. They want “Jesus girls” not short-skirted Jezebels. They don’t want to wake up each morning with a woman who has been in a dozen other beds with a dozen other men. It goes without saying that a pure-hearted man desires for his life mate a pure-hearted woman.
But, even pagan sex hounds have essentially admitted to me that they eventually want to settle down with a good Christian girl. And to them I say, “Good luck. You’ll need it.”
You see, she won’t have you. If she’s truly godly in her heart — quite distinct from the girl who has mastered Jesus lingo and plays a good game of Christian make believe — she’ll want nothing to do with you. She’d rather kiss a buzzard.
Sure, you’re a smooth devil, skilled in seductive arts (you suppose). But even against that, there are lines of defense. You see, she’s a virtuous woman by no accident. Chances are that she is surrounded by godly people: a strong father with convictions you know nothing about, a mother to model virtue, siblings, extended family, and church friends who share and reinforce her values. And it is these good people who will bring her to her senses if somehow your efforts to ensnare her should begin to succeed.
Alas, what can a young heathen do in this case? Is he destined to go without? Must he watch helplessly as the best of prospects opt one after another for the good guys he quietly despised? Will they enjoy the last laugh?
There’s actually some good news for you, my impious infidel friend. Most godly girls would at least consider overlooking your past sins and foolishness if only they could be convinced that your past is truly in the past. All is not yet lost. A wonderful, gentle, beautiful woman of true virtuous character may be possible for you. Your future marriage might be free of worry that while you are away on a business trip, your wife is repeating her high school stunts with the milk man or a Facebook “friend.”
Here’s how you do it: Repent. Yes, you! Stop the deplorable practice of using girls for your own purposes. Begin to see them — all of them — as precious to their Creator. Turn to Jesus Christ in a sincere way. Do so because it is right, not for what it might later gain you in marriage or in life.
A moral miscreant like you will not score a virtuous girl. She’ll turn her face at the sight of you. But a moral miscreant like you can, with the help of Jesus Christ, be transformed into the kind of virtuous man whose genuine love for the Living Lord might gain from her a second glance and for you a glimmer of hope.
The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Barb Wire.