You Could Get Sued for Saying That

Barb Wire

When I wrote here last week and called the whole Global Warming/Climate Change business a scam, motivated by an insatiable lust for power, a reader got mad enough to email me dark hints that I just might get sued if I keep on “lying” about this rock-solid scientific truth. Only shills for the oil companies, he said, continue to deny that we’re all gonna die from Climate Change unless we pay big fat carbon taxes and give politicians more and more power to interfere with our lives.

Yes, the science is settled, the debate is over (not that there ever was one), and us peasants had better just shut up and do what we’re told. Because—now get this—“scientists are above ideology,” insisted Mr. Lawsuit, and would never, ever deceive the public.

It’s amazing that anyone could be so puddin’-headed as to say that, much less believe it. Are scientists just naturally sinless, or do they have to take a course in it? What makes temptation ricochet right off them, like bullets bouncing off Superman? How is it that they, alone among the human race, have no ideology? But you might as well tell jokes to a statue, as try to have a rational discussion with anyone who believes such a thing.

Frankly, I’m not much interested in the “science” of Global Warming. I’m not equipped to analyze computer models. I don’t even want to blame it all on scientists, because it’s the left-wing political elite who tempt the scientists—presuming, as I do, that they can be tempted by offers of lucrative research grants, wide public acclamation as experts and sages, and the chance to be the advisers to really powerful people who can have other people shot.

It’s not the models or any stack of data, but the behavior of the Climate Change crowd, that gives the game away.

If Al Gore, John Kerry, Obama and all the rest of them really, truly believe in “man-made climate change” as threatening imminent and total doom, why don’t they make some changes in their lifestyle? At the very least, they could set an example. But no—they live in great palatial mansions, zoom all over the world in private jets, and leave carbon footprints the size of city blocks. Would we take a Christian preacher seriously, if we saw him getting drunk at a brothel every night? Certainly Obama, Kerry, and Gore don’t behave like they believe in Global Warming.

Warming fanatics—I’d better not name names, lest they sue me, or hire goons to beat me up, or resort to any other means by which science gets settled nowadays—have called for the imprisonment of “Climate Change deniers.” Others have demanded that their critics’ funding be cut off, or that their critics’ children not be allowed to earn college degrees. These firebrands have not yet called for any keying of cars, kidnapping of little dogs, or signing doubters up for unwanted aluminum siding. But is making threats, regardless of what kind, the behavior you expect from honest men?

Oh—did I mention we’re having one cold mother of a winter, the second such winter in a row? We are not disposed to believe the U.N.’s grand B.S. announcement that 2014 was the warmest year in history. We froze our kiesters off last winter and we’re freezing ‘em again in this one. Let’s see Kerry stand in one of those epic Boston snowbanks and tell the crowd, through teeth chattering like castanets, how toasty-warm they really are, and just don’t know it because the Climate Change deniers have deluded them.

And if any of you denial deniers out there disagree with what I say, I’ll sue you.

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of Barb Wire.

Lee Duigon
Lee Duigon, a contributing editor with the Chalcedon Foundation, is a former newspaper reporter and editor, small businessman, teacher, and horror novelist. He has been married to his wife, Patricia, for 34 years. See his new fantasy/adventure novels, Bell Mountain and The Cellar Beneath the Cellar, available on

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