Sex and the Singularly Abused Girl
“I had been living and traveling in a world full of dykes…in our moments of honesty and courage, we exposed ourselves and our wounds to each other and found that a remarkable percentage of us had suffered at the hands of adult men in our lives and families.” Lesbian author, editor Laura Autoniou in her essay “Anti-Venom for the Soul” (PoMoSexuals: Challenging Assumptions About Gender and Sexuality [Cleis Press, 1997], p. 115)
Imagine a conspiracy within the tobacco industry to glamorize smoking while simultaneously suppressing any linkage between the use of cigarettes and lung cancer, emphysema, COPD and other chronic lung diseases. Vast sums of money are spent on advertising, attempting to make smoking appear fun, satisfying, progressive and chic—never dangerous or stupid. Campaign contributions ensure that an obfuscating cloud of tobacco “smoke” (along with mirrors) settles over the political process. Schools and studies are endowed; rabbits tested and chased; science spun and every exception to the harder-and-harder-to-ignore rules is trumpeted from the housetops.
And millions of people, directly or indirectly, suffer and die.
Obviously, there’s no need to imagine it. This very thing happened in America and lasted for decades…until the tragic costs of believing a lie and normalizing something that is contrary to human flourishing simply became impossible to ignore.
Despite man’s best efforts to do what feels good and right in his own eyes, truth in the end will triumph. Or to put it another way: we don’t just break the laws of nature and nature’s God. They break us.
It’s my deep belief and fear—shared by millions of others who worship and serve this God—that precisely the same thing is happening with the growing movement to cast-off scripture and multiplied centuries of Western (read: Christian) tradition and instead normalize homosexuality or more broadly (because this is truly the endgame) pomosexuality. We are once again suppressing facts, ignoring history, cherry-picking data points, embracing groupthink, and allowing ourselves to be seduced by mavens of spin and self-serving agendas.
The biggest difference between the two campaigns? The consequences of believing and embracing this lie will ultimately be far more profound and destructive than those tied to shilling cancer sticks. As the Apostle Paul made acutely clear in an epistle millions believe to be the most life and world-changing letter ever written: any culture that conflates the image of God as reflected in the fundamental binary structure of mankind (Gen. 1:27); then exchanges the natural function of these binary halves in relation to sexual activity (Rom.1:26,27); and finally embraces this exchange as normal and good (vs. 32b) is doomed. There remains only a terrifying expectation of judgment as God withdraws His hand and allows them to fully reap what they have sown.
A book can and should be written about the broad propaganda campaign that has been waged against the God-ordained structure for gender and human sexuality. It could well be unparalleled in human history, beggaring the treacherous accomplishments of the tobacco industry by comparison: how a barrage of lies, damn lies and spun statistics; quack science; spurious analogies; stolen valor; fear and intimidation tactics, manufactured martyrs and Orwellian newspeak have accomplished the near impossible; what most Americans would have found hard to even contemplate just ten tears ago: legalized homosexual marriage in all fifty states.
Let’s briefly focus on just one small sliver of the propaganda pie, touched on in the opening quote—written, we should note, by a lesbian and published in a radically pro-pomosexuality book: the epic public denial among pomosexualists of any causal connection between sexual abuse and the development of homo-erotic attraction among women. The following examples represent just the tip of the iceberg.
Mary Lambert, a self-identified lesbian who wrote and sings the hook in Macklemore’s wildly successful pro-homosexual anthem “Same Love,” recently admitted that she had been raped by her father, abused by her “mom’s partners” and gang-raped when she was 17.
Cher’s daughter, Chastity Bono—now Chaz after sex-reassignment surgery—wrote in her memoir The End of Innocence (2003) that when she was 11-years-old she was sexually seduced by “Joan,” a lesbian friend of her mother’s who later became Chastity’s sexual confidant. She went on to then describe another dynamic that is also common (though far from universal) with people who experience homosexual impulses: the lack of a close relationship with the same-gendered parent.
“My mom wasn’t always around, since she was working, so Joan sort of filled in that gap…I just focused on the fact that I wasn’t getting enough attention, and I often felt lonely or abandoned. When I spent time with Joan, I felt like the center of attention…” (pp. 10–11).
Rosie O’Donnell, who also had profound mother-issues, has powerfully spoken and written about being sexually abused by a 25-year-old man when she was ten and the varied and profound impacts it has had on her life. Curiously, being same-sex attracted is not one of them.
Comedian Margaret Cho, who self-identifies as bisexual and lives in an open relationship with her husband, has also acknowledged being molested and raped as a young girl. “I just happened to be physically smaller and that’s not my fault,” she said, “so I refuse to let that bad stuff hang around and mess me up. How much it has taken from me, I have no idea— I refuse to look at it, so it doesn’t exist.” This type of avoidance concerning the profound effects of abuse on sexual inclinations and behavior has become standard among self-identified homo-, bi- and trans-sexual people.
Sapphire is the author of the 1996 novel Push that was made into the Oscar-winning movie, Precious. The book and movie tells the story of story of Claireece “Precious” Jones, an illiterate, obese, 16-year-old girl pregnant with a second child by her own father and who now self-identifies (cue Hollywood applause track) as a lesbian. Sapphire, who labels herself bisexual, told the London Evening Standard in 2010 that her father, a Korean War vet, molested her when she was eight. Her mother then abandoned her five years later. “It was traumatic—but to be left with our crazy dad, doubly so,” she told the paper.
Writer, poet, feminist, gay activist and S&M advocate, Dorothy Allison, was repeatedly raped by her stepfather. It started when she was five and lasted for seven years, stopping when she finally found the courage to tell a relative. The abuse later resumed and lasted another five years. She eventually contractedgonorrhea from him.
In a video interview that appeared in the DVD extras of the documentary After Stonewall, Allison lets the cat out of the bag on a number of common pomosexual perspectives that public-relations types championing the normalization of homosexuality would like to keep under wraps: a low view of marriage and monogamy and how the triad she, her lesbian partner and the gay father of their child formed she believes is every bit as good and legitimate—and perhaps even better—a family and child-rearing structure as “Ozzie and Harriet’s.” Along with these admissions, her “straight men/father-issues” and their influence on her sexual orientation were very much on display for anyone who cared to consider them objectively, without the filter of the pro-pomosexual agenda.
Queen Latifah, who is widely rumored to be a homosexual and has provided lots of evidence to support it, told Essence Magazine in 2009 about being sexually abused as a child. “He violated me…I never told anybody; I just buried it as deeply as I could and kept people at an arm’s distance. I never really let a person get too close to me.”
The quote is a telling one. No thinking person will deny that sexual abuse can have an enormous impact on the victim’s psyche. Latifah openly acknowledges that it led to serious commitment issues that have kept her from marrying. No controversy there. Ditto all manner of other well-documented psychological and physical problems connected with childhood sexual abuse: poor self-esteem, frigidity, promiscuity, disassociation during sex, bi-polar disorder, obesity, depression, anxiety disorders, feelings of profound shame, PTSD, substance abuse, impulsivity, self-harm…on and on. But when it comes to also influencing a person’s sexual orientation—something that more and more studies and pomosexuality advocates acknowledge as being fluid, particularly among women, and therefore impressionable…well only a idiot or a homophobe would dare suggest such a thing
You know you’re up-to-your-eyeballs in a massive propaganda campaign, delusional groupthink, or both when you run across this level of entrenched denial and irrationality.
In her autobiography The Truth Is . . .: My Life in Love and Music, Melissa Etheridge shocked more than a few people—including her sister, Jennifer, no doubt—by writing very openly about her sexual initiation. When Melissa was six, Jennifer starting molesting her. The abuse lasted for four years.
On top of that, like Rosie O’Donnell and Chastity Bono, Etheridge also described feeling distant from her mother—already noted as another common factor in sexual confusion. And while she can admit to the gay magazine Advocate that these experiences “definitely set (her) to go down that road” to homosexuality and further told USA Today that the sexual abuse “…makes me who I am today” (6/15/2001), she nevertheless insists that she was “definitely born gay.”
Yep. And so-and-so’s genes and not her two-pack a day habit is why she’s dying of lung cancer.
This would all be laughable if it were not so tragic—for the individuals caught up in this madness as well as for its impact on our culture’s destiny.
I could go on…but will close with this: In 2011 The Advocate ran a story on Don Lemon, the CNN news anchor who had recently come out as a homosexual. The article noted the sexual abuse he experienced as a boy from a neighborhood pedophile.
Several readers responded online to the story. The following comment not only connects the dots between abuse and sexual orientation, it powerfully demonstrates the extent to which our culture’s mad rush to normalize homosexuality is blinding us to what should be the most obvious thing in the world: that is―as pomosexual editor Laura Autoniou observed in our opening quote―a “remarkable percentage” of (homosexuals) are the victims of sexual abuse.
“I am very happy to be a… gay person. But if I admit being raped as an 8-year-old then most people think that I am gay because of being raped. It is as if I don’t own my own personality in their eyes, that it was inflicted upon me. Even worse some will invariably believe that I can be “cured” by coming to terms with being raped. Sometimes I want to talk about it, but I hate how people see me when I do.”
No one should ever be made to feel shame or looked down upon for the brokenness they experience as a result of being victimized. Quite the contrary, they need and deserve our compassion, love and respect. But in the same way we would never dream of affirming a victim’s substance-abuse, depression, detachment disorder, or poor self-esteem as something they should accept and embrace and we as a society should normalize and celebrate, neither should we let our love, compassion and respect for homosexuals sentimentally devolve into affirmations of their sexual or gender disorder. That’s not love.
In the end, it will look a lot more like hate.
 A word coined within the LGBTQ community; short-hand for “post-modern sexuality.” Pomosexuality refers to a non-orientation in which people disregard all sexual and gender labels and are free to express themselves however they want.
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