Hey Kids…Mom is Really Dad. Also, Dad is Mom
By Rebekah Maxwell – BarbWire guest contributor
This Week’s Sign the Apocalypse is Upon Us
It’s hard to be a kid these days. With the foundations of Western civilization crumbling around their ears, and prospect of inheriting the charred rubble of what once was a free society, our little ones need something to look forward to. Some stability that helps them cope with life’s uncertainty. And where else should they run to, but home? To the loving arms of Mom and Dad, whom they know and trust.
Even if you don’t know that Dad isn’t Dad…but Mom.
A Kentucky couple has a fun surprise for their two little babes. They’re preparing to tell their young children that Mom is Really Dad. Also, Dad is Mom.
A transgender couple are preparing to tell their children when they get older that their father actually gave birth to them and the person that they call their mother is in fact their father.
Bianca and Nick Bowser are a happily married couple and live in Kentucky with their two young sons.
Nick, 27, was born a girl, called Nicole, but for the last seven years has lived as a man. Bianca, 32, who is a drag artist, was born as a boy called Jason, and transitioned to live as a woman 11 years ago.
The transgender couple still have their original sex organs because they cannot afford reconstructive surgery.
Sadly, they can’t afford to have their genitals switched (somebody take up a collection…or get them a subsidy). But in the words of the immortal Wendy’s commercial, “parts is parts.” They were each burdened with parts they didn’t want, that “didn’t match” their feelings, they said. But they valiantly struggled with their biological burden, because they wanted to. And that’s what’s most important.
Nick says: ‘We have a healthy sex life and we wanted a biological child – this was the only way we could do it.’
Nick fell pregnant with Kai in 2010, but struggled to cope with living as a man with a baby bump.
‘I didn’t enjoy it. I’m a man and it’s just not easy doing something so feminine, but I coped.”
Unable to bear the thought of natural birth a second time, Nick opted for a caesarean with Pax.
‘It cut out part of the very female process of giving birth. But It’s all been worth it, regardless of how difficult it was.’
Ah, nothing more beautiful than the love between a child and his dad/mom. But what about Mom/Dad? How did she/he feel about what her/his spouse was going through?
Bianca did not mind missing that part of being woman. She says: ‘I was very happy not to carry the children. It was great to get out of it – the inconvenience, the physical changes, the pain of birth.’
The essence of parenting: getting out of personal inconvenience and fitting your kids into your lifestyle. Oh, speaking of which, what about those kids? How will they take this news?
Nick says: ‘Kai always calls Bianca, Mum and me, Dad.
‘We’ll tell the children the truth when it’s the right time – we’ve got nothing to hide…but I don’t worry about how they will react. We will not treat it as a ‘bad’ thing. And young kids are accepting and non-judgemental.’
They insist their children, Kai, now three, and Pax, almost one, will be fine because their upbringing will be loving, supportive, secure, and perfectly ‘normal’.
Perfectly normal. A brand new normal, but normal. Mom can be Dad, or another Mom, or Dad can be Mom on the inside, or Mommy on the weekends, or one of three Moms. All of it perfectly normal. Why should anyone think differently?
In fact, why should their children be confused or disconcerted by the concept? Why would it be strange for their young sons to know that Mom has the same swimsuit area as they do? For that matter, how do they know THEY are boys? Who, and how, are they to judge?
I certainly hope those little boys (?) weren’t born bigots. That would just be awkward.
Rebekah Maxwell grew up from stage to stage in a Midwestern gypsy band, singing and playing music with her family. She was homeschooled from backstage to the front pew, a system that suited her independent, slightly contrary, nature. She completed her high school work at age 16, and then promptly got a job as announcer at a local radio station, opting for a career that combined music, microphones and live performance with a steady paycheck. She began reporting and producing at WHO Radio in 2007, with on-air work recognized by the official alphabet soup: the AP, IBNA, NBNA, RTDNA, NAB (all the while staying far from the TSA and UFOs). While she attended Drake University to learn the ropes of legitimate broadcast journalism, she’s also been quoted as saying that her experience with the Deace Show has been at least as educational as college (and at a lower interest rate). She delights in debating religion, politics, and all other subjects impolite at the dinner table. Her favorite time of year is Caucus season, and she’s an accomplished slam poet, ready to spit the truth…in mad rhymes, if necessary.
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